Break Up With Your Girlfriend Easily: Top Tips From George Clooney

June 3, 2008

Some very funny tips "from" George Clooney on the right way to dump your girl. Ok…these really WEREN’T written by George, rather written for George on a funny online column. But if you need some extra incentive, or simply a few good ideas for getting rid of YOUR girl – who better than to listen to rather than the main man himself? You can check out the full story at the link below..;-)

In any event, that may seem to be no way to treat a lady, but if Clooney were to write a book on dating, this would be his advice. First, realize there is no way to avoid pain. Like a band aid, it’s better to rip it off all at once. No matter how excruciating it is, the bad publicity will be over in one or two news cycles, max.Tell her you hope to stay in touch, and that you still care about her. In fact, tell her anything to get her to pack her stuff and get out of your LA mansion. Conveniently leave the country to avoid an awkward scene. However, try to avoid pulling a Fiddy Cent. Don’t burn down your house if your ex-girlfriend refuses to leave. Remember, arson, even when the damn ‘ho deserves it, is still a felony. Do not break up with the person by phone, instant message, or e-mail; this is disrespectful. Have the decency to do it privately in person. However, if your girlfriend has the temperment of Naomi Campbell, it’s best to phone. Just make sure she’s not within throwing distance when you call her. Better yet, have your personal assistant call. After all, what are screwing her for?If you don’t really want to be friends with her, don’t say, "Oh, but we can still be friends." It only hurts more when you avoid eye contact as you walk down the red carpet, and she’s behind the velvet rope trying to get your attention with the rest of your annoying fans.